So as a good friend of mine recently pointed out to me, a lot of my blog entries are about hip lingo. Additionally, he questioned where I "come up" with the phrases I use, wondering if I just wake up on a weekly basis and decide to use some new phrase. The answer to this question is no. However, his questions and suggestions have inspired a new (hopefully weekly) blog entry outlining what's hip in terms of communication.
This week's lingo: "If the question is..."
Before I introduce this week's lingo, I must present you with the disclaimer that it may not necessarily be fitting or appropriate for verbal communication, but for Facebook and texting, it is ideal.
So you find yourself in a situation where you have a very straightforward thing to say to a friend. For instance, you may be wanting to say, "I'm super sunburned," or "I accidentally bought tickets to Go Tejano! day at the rodeo," or even "I'm hungry," but you find these straightforward statements just too bland for any conversation you are hoping to have. Because honestly, if you received any of these text messages, perhaps other than the second one, you may find yourself either not replying or saying something along the lines of lol or I'm sorry.
So rather than send that typical text message, you choose to spice it up. Example: You have been at the beach all day and you are extremely sunburned, therefore you are exhausted and not in the mood to go out. You have the choice of texting your girlfriend "I am super sunburned," but you choose the alternative, "If the question is am I completely toasted, the answer is yes." Example: You drove all the way to Houston to watch your little sister ride in a horse show and the catch up with your parents and sister and new brother-in-law. Fortunately for you, Rodeo Houston is also in town. Unfortunately, your mother was in charge of buying the tickets and she bought them for the day when the Tejano band was performing. Rather than text your best friend, "I accidentally showed up to Go Tejano Day! at the Rodeo," you may choose to send "If the question is is the entire population of Mexico at the rodeo today, the answer is yes!" Example: You have been on spring break all week and are back on campus, only to find that all of the on-campus food options are still on vacation. Unfortunately, the only food in your dorm is half a roll of Ritz crackers and a tub of chocolate frosting that you can't even eat because you gave up sugar for lent. Needless to say, you are starving. When texting your friend about this dangerous situation, you have the choice of saying "I am hungry," or you may find that "If the question is am I about to eat my arm, the answer is yes!" better fits how you are feeling.
While this syntax may not always fit a situation, it is particularly useful when one is hoping to add humor or intensity to a comment. It shouldn't be used in excess but definitely when fitting for a comment in a conversation.
